The Rain Will Go Away
by ThanksForTheMemories
Summary: Separate lives in separate cities, they meet again. But one summer of tragedy can change things forever. RyanMarissaTaylor COMPLETED
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Rain Will Go Away

**Author:** ThanksForTheMemories

**Rating:** K

**Pairing:** Ryan/Marissa/Taylor

**Summery:** Separate lives in separate cities, they see each other again. Ryan/Marissa/Taylor story.

**Author's note:** I know I had an identical story to this, I made some adjustments—but I wanted to put more drama into it so I decided to keep Marissa in the story!

_**Whether it fades or crashes, every song ends.**_

-

Taylor settled into Yale perfectly, her room mate was the typical college girl, and Taylor related to her very well—and they had actually forged a strong bond with each other, BFFL'S was what they called each other. It had been 3 years since she left for college, and today was the first time she decided to go home for thanksgiving break—anxiety filled her as she thought about seeing Marissa and Ryan again, she never really did say a proper goodbye to him, she just left a message on his answering machine and got on a plane without another word. And as for Marissa—she really hadn't kept in touch with her, she knew Marissa and Ryan would be attending Berkeley together in the fall—and she didn't want to witness that, making her decision even easier.

She thought about her new life at college, and she smiled, she was studying journalism and hoping that she would write for a newspaper when she finished with Yale's journalism program—it was a comforting thought—she had accepted her scholarship, and was happy with her decision, she just understood that all things come to an end and this was no different, and even though it hurt—she had never regretted her decision.

Her love life consisted of dating several partners at a time—but one morning she woke up and decided to stop serial dating, and to her surprise, last month, she had bumped into Tyler Flores—she had met him when she collided into his chest on campus, and in English class... He was the typical nice guy and she knew he was perfect. They had been dancing around the possibility of a relationship for the past weeks and she needed a break—thus, her return to California.

"So how's Tyler?" Michelle winked at Taylor

"I haven't called him yet—he's spending thanksgiving in Louisiana with his family"

"Why haven't you? I'd tap him if I wasn't off the market" she winked

"It's complicated" Taylor laughed—she steered clear of him for the past couple of days, hoping that they wouldn't be caught in an awkward moment again.

"He's cute, those adorable grey-blue eyes and messy brown hair—I'd totally go for him"

"God, Stop talking like that"

"It's the truth"

"Whatever" Taylor shook her head

-

As Ryan and Marissa drove down the streets of Berkeley—they neared the Cohen home, where they celebrated thanksgiving every year.

She had returned from her year long journey of discovery and resumed college with Ryan—she never really got over him—she still really loved him, but she had to go—all explained in her letter to him. She was now studying fashion design and she loved every second of it. Ryan and she remained close friends—she wanted whatever she could get, and told herself that they would get a second chance sooner or later, so she waited…

Ryan was reading Taylor's blog on his laptop as Marissa drove down the street—'_so she's coming back, better late than never'_ he shook his head—Ryan let his mind wonder to Connecticut and to Taylor, she told him in her stupid message that they needed to discover each other at college, and she needed to do it by herself—he was angry at first, then upset, but soon, he discovered her blog and began reading it when he had spare time. He became happy for her, she deserved everything she wanted in life and he hoped from the bottom of his heart that she would achieve all her dreams, even if he weren't in them.

"Ryan? What's up?" Marissa's voice broke him out of his thoughts—he knew that she still had feelings, but he just wasn't looking for a romance with her anymore. He had moved on when she left.

"Nothing" Ryan smiled

"It just seemed that you were drifting off"

"Looks like we're here" Ryan watched Marissa turn off the engine and open the door "Good to be home"

"Yeah, it's nice to spend time with the family once in a while" she agreed and walked up those familiar concrete steps.

'_I just hope she'll stop running away this time'_ he let his mind wonder to the certain girl that stole his heart "Taylor's coming back for thanksgiving" he blurted

Marissa turned around in shock "What?! Are you serious?" she asked incrediously "Are you glad she's coming back?"

"I guess when she walked away from me, she walked away from the likelihood of a friendship" he shrugged "But we recognized that we were too different—we were holding onto something that never was supposed to happen in the first place"

"Why wasn't it supposed to happen?" Marissa wondered out loud

"You know… you left, I came back for thanksgiving—Taylor and I got close, and spent the rest of the summer together, we were young and naïve, we didn't know what we wanted… but she came and she showed me that I won't get hurt if I let people help" he smiled over at Marissa "But then college was starting again and I realized that our relationship turned into a chore and we fought more than we smiled—but I never regretted starting a romance with Taylor"

"You 2 were in love, I know how it feels to give everything to the person they love—only to get ripped apart" she sighed and thought back to all her past romances—out of all of these, Ryan was probably the only one she truly loved "Finally…" she turned around to a jiggle of the door knob

"What took you guys so long?" Ryan walked over to Summer and smile "We've been waiting for so long"

"We were all in the back yard mucking around with the kids—come on in" Summer stepped aside and let the 2 walk in "I haven't seen you 2 since Easter—that's like, a million years ago!" Summer had gone to GEORGE for the year long trip and rallied with her hippy friends before she returned to Rhode Island and picked up her romance with Seth—who was doing very well in graphic design.

Marissa smiled widely and hugged her best friend tightly "Sum, I've missed you so much"

"Me too! Kaitlin and Julie are at the back—your mom won't shut up about seeing you again… while Kaitlin has been doing her own thing" Summer rolled her eyes—she had grown close to the other Cooper sister while Marissa was on the boat, but Kaitlin could be very direct when she wanted to be.

Kaitlin walked in "I see you're back, you haven't really contacted me while you were away at college—but only coming back for 3 or 4 visits a year—priceless" Kaitlin smiled and caught a glare from Marissa "Just kidding—I just wanted to make you uncomfortable—because I love seeing Marissa Cooper squirm"

"Oh, how have I missed you too" Marissa rolled her eyes "How's Williams? I hear you're studying journalism—doing well at it I presume?"

"Seems as though you're the next Taylor Townsend" Ryan commented and smiled—Kaitlin had always reminded him of a part of Taylor—her independence and confidence shone through and he had grown to build a strong friendship with the nineteen year old.

"Taylor's hilarious—she's so cool" Kaitlin laughed "She's coming back for thanksgiving, that's why I've been in such a good mood"

Marissa frowned _'never did she say that about me'_

"C'mon—let's go outside, I know mom really wants to see Marissa—and I need to get to the airport" she led the group outside to the festivities.

-

As Taylor and Michelle got off the 6 hour flight from the east to the west, they went their separate ways—Michelle was off to Sacramento to visit her family while Taylor was on her way to Berkeley and then heading down to Newport to visit her mom.

"So we part ways here" Michelle dropped her bag and embraced Taylor "I'll miss you"

Taylor giggled "I'll miss you too" she paused "We haven't really spent this long away from each other since we met"

Michelle thought about it "I know—I've just realized"

"See you in a couple of weeks"

"Bye" Taylor picked up her bag and saw a long white limousine drive up and the younger Cooper sister step out "Kaitlin!"

"Taylor! I finally get to see you again; the whole family has missed you so much" The 2 best friends hugged and squealed "Let's get you home"

-

They were on their way back and talking about their lives at college and how much they enjoy studying journalism and writing; how much they dated and how much parties they've gone to.

"So is Ryan there?" Taylor wondered

"Actually, he is—and so is Marissa"

"It's okay; I'll have to see him sooner or later right? And it's only for like 10 days before I go back to Newport"

"Stay longer—you're like the only person I look forward to seeing" Kaitlin frowned

"How about Marissa?" Taylor wrinkled her eyebrows

"She's my sister; I'm supposed to like her—but you're hilarious… and one of my best friends"

"That's sweet, but I promised my mom that I would spend some time with her—and she's so excited" Taylor shrugged "but you'll always be my number 1" she offered

"I better be"

-

The family had spent the afternoon laughing and enjoying Berkeley's sunlight before getting ready for dinner and drinks—Marissa and Julie caught up with each other, mother and daughter time was much needed, Julie filled Marissa in about her perfect life while Marissa told her about college.

"So how is the architecture program?" Kirsten and Sandy sat down from hours of playing with Sophie and Lucas

"It's really tough, but I like the challenge—it keeps me on my toes"

"It's good to hear—Sandy's been busy with law"

"I know, but I never see you around campus"

"I'm always correcting papers" Sandy shook his head "but I enjoy it"

"So Ryan, any girls in your life?" Kirsten wondered out loud

Ryan took it by surprise, the question was a bolt from the blue "Not really—I'm too busy with school, I just don't have time"

"It's good to have a break from girls—you've never been single for too long since you arrived in Newport; Marissa, Theresa, Lindsay, Sadie, Chloe and Taylor" Sandy listed all of Ryan's past loves

"Thanks for bringing it up again" Ryan said sarcastically

"No problem" he sniggered

-

As Taylor stepped out of the limo and walked up those steps, her stomach filled with fear of rejection—rejection from Ryan and she didn't know if she could cope with that—they hadn't seen or spoken to each other for almost 3 years and she wondered if he was still the same guy she dated back then.

Kaitlin opened the front door and they stepped in—and there she was met by his baby blue eyes, they didn't really stare _at_ her, he seemed as though staring through her—the baby blues were filled with sadness and emptiness, that it made her feel sick—sick that she caused that much hurt to him.

'_I knew this was a bad idea' _she sighed and forced a smile for the family.

-

_**Please read and review!**_


	2. Chapter 2

**Rating: **'K'

**Author's Note:** Sorry for not updating for ages! I was really busy with my dramatic high school life. My friends were in a fight and one of them started cutting herself. Made me cry, 'Jane' (Name will not be mentioned), please stop causing harm to yourself—if you open your eyes, you'll see that you have a great group of friends that will be your support network, if you just give us the chance and let us in.

Sorry about my rambling—I wrote that because I wanted to tell her that, but she's been shutting us out.

-

**Chapter 2**

-

Marissa sat down with her mother on the swing outside, glad that the awkward dinner was over—and that she couldn't see anymore of Ryan's glances towards Taylor. The 2 former lovers had decided to go on a walk right after dinner to talk about their issues.

Julie slid over and let her eldest daughter sit down "Tonight was awkward"

Marissa sighed "Am I crazy? I love him, he loves Taylor and Taylor loves …. I'm not really sure—but why can't he love me back?"

"The heart does what it wants, we can't force somebody to fall _out_ of love or force somebody to fall _in_ love"

"How I wish things would happen so differently, I tried to change things so many times but he just couldn't see"

"You're not the one for him, even if he's the one for you. But I promise you that one day, you'll find a guy that will love you back, and you'll love him more than you ever loved Ryan Atwood"

"I'm envious of Taylor, because I once knew what it was like to be the one he longed for—and that's what hurts the most, knowing that I could have had him—silly that I thought I would always have his heart"

"I told you, the heart makes you do stupid things"

"Thanks for the confidence, mom" Marissa rolled her eyes

"I'm just telling you the truth" Julie offered "Maybe you should move on"

"Maybe I should"

-

Ryan and Taylor walked down to the local park enjoying the night air; they took a seat on the cold bench and continued talking.

"How's journalism going for you? Is Yale everything you hoped it would be?" Ryan asked

"I enjoy it. How about you? Berkeley keeping you busy?"

"I love it there—better than anybody imagined"

Taylor focused her gaze on a leaf on the ground, knowing full well that Ryan said that to make her feel guilty about leaving "I'm sorry for leaving"

"Don't be. The past is in the past, we should look forward into the future"

"Look forward but don't forget, right?"

"Right" Ryan agreed

"I'm sorry it took me this long to realize that I've missed all of you that much—3 years can go by really fast"

"I know, and as time crawls by, we'll probably all be getting married and having kids"

"Do you want kids?" Taylor smiled warmly

"Definitely, I'll love to have children—but I want to have a steady career and be happy with myself before I even consider it"

"Me too, but not right now—maybe after college and when I'm married" Taylor agreed

"Do you wonder what it would be like if we stayed together?" Ryan wondered out of the blue

Taylor looked over "Sometimes, when I'm feeling nostalgic about the past and present. But not all the time, How about you?"

"Same, I was just thinking if we stayed together, would we still be like this, still talking? Or would we be fighting and being negative"

"I think you know the answer"

"I do" silence filled the air and in her usual Townsend-ish way, she broke it "Why'd you bring it up?"

"I just needed some closure"

"Things have changed, they're not the same. Things are different now" Taylor explained

"You don't understand how much pain and confusion you put me through when you left out of the blue"

"So we're rehashing the past now" Taylor never raised her voice, but she had the urge to do it in this instance

"I guess we are"

"I knew you would be like this" she shook her head negatively

"Of course I would be like this! You walked out of my life, you didn't even call"

"The world does not revolve around you, Ryan Atwood"

"You gave up first, have you ever been ripped apart? Have you given everything to the one you love, only to get it ripped away?"

"I knew that you and Marissa would somehow get back together! That's why I left"

"We didn't, so you left for no reason"

"Then I guess we were too young to understand what love was"

Ryan stood up "Than where are we supposed to go from here?"

"I don't know" Taylor put her head in her hands "I always thought I had everything planned out, finish senior year, go to college, graduate and get a great career…" she looked up at Ryan "But somehow, I got married and divorced in one summer, dropped out of college, kicked out of home and found love"

"Everything's thrown out the window" Ryan finished for her "I know"

"To be honest, you really don't know"

"Yes I do… I've been adrift since you've left—and now that you're back, everything's off balance"

"Whatever"

"Why are you acting like this?"

"Because we can't pick up our little fling from where we left it—everything's changed, including us"

"This is goodbye then" Ryan said apprehensively

"I guess so" Taylor got up and stared at him for a moment—and then walked off.

-

Kaitlin watched Taylor run up into her room from her walk with Ryan and she followed her up, as she made her way towards Taylor's room, she could hear muffled sobs and sighed _'I knew this was going to happen' _she whispered to herself and knocked.

"Piss off" Taylor shouted into her pillow "I'm not in the mood"

"That's not a very nice way to speak to your bestie" Kaitlin said through the door

"Kaitlin—I just need some time. I'll talk to you tomorrow morning" she wiped her tears away and closed her eyes

"Fine" Kaitlin sighed and made her way downstairs, running into a very irritated looking Ryan "Nice job, you made her cry"

"It's not my fault that she's melodramatic" Ryan defended himself and mumbled an inaudible word and went into the lounge room and sat there, brooding.

Kaitlin rolled her eyes _'drama drama drama'_

-

**Please read and review! I'll update as soon as possible. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Rating:** 'K'

**Author's note:** This is essentially a RyanMarissaTaylor story (I don't know how else to put it)—the story will take place in one summer, and how everything and everybody can change in a short time. And for all the people questioning if Ryan will end up with any of the girls, he won't. I'll tell you first, so all the people that want to see them together, wont. I'm working on a better ending. A good end to the O.C. saga, I think.

-

**Chapter 3**

-

Taylor walked outside into the summer sun and absorbed the heat. She glanced at Ryan cleaning his car and rolled her eyes, they hadn't spoken since the fight and she was getting sick of the silent treatment. So she casually strolled over to Ryan washing and Marissa reading a magazine on the sidewalk.

"Hey guys" Taylor smiled awkwardly and sat down beside Marissa

"Hey" Ryan spoke, not even a hint of hurt in his voice

Marissa was sick of all this shit and sat up, turning to Taylor "If you don't like him then stop stringing him along," she then turned around and threw her magazine at Ryan "and you! You've always been clueless, I like you, and I've always had. And if you can't see that than you're as stupid as her! Stop chasing her if she doesn't want to be chased" Marissa sneered "I'm so sick of this shit, I'm so fucking over it. You 2 piss me off" and she stormed off down the street, leaving Ryan and Taylor speechless.

"That was unexpected" Ryan finally said

Taylor sighed "She's right, we need to get a life and stop worrying about each other" and walked off in the other direction.

-

Marissa had came home drunk that night, stumbling and knocking down things while she made her way up to her room. And in the morning, Ryan and Seth found her passed out on the couch—she didn't make it back to her bed. The 2 guys knew this was the start of her downward spiral.

They decided to keep it quiet so Julie and Kaitlin wouldn't find out—they didn't need to know Marissa was beginning to go back to the way she was. There was only a couple of days until the summer was over right?

-

Taylor was packing her bags into the car—the problem with her, Ryan and Marissa solved itself out, she would leave and Marissa and Ryan would work everything out themselves. At least she hoped that it would.

Ryan volunteered to drive her to the airport and she agreed.

"I'm sorry for the way I acted" he apologized

"Me too"

"I realize that each time I see your face, I know there's a part of me that can't bear to let you go"

"Ryan…"

"I just want you to know that you saved me"

"You helped me iron out a few issues of my own" Taylor joked

Ryan pulled into the drop off and switched off the engine "So how long are you staying at the homestead?"

"A week, then I'm heading back to the east"

"One last kiss?" he offered

"Fine" she leaned over and pecked him on the lips and opened the door "Bye Ryan"

"Bye"

-

Ryan returned to the Berkeley to find Marissa outside drinking "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"What does it look like I'm doing?" she said sarcastically

"It's 11 in the morning, and you're getting smashed?"

"Why not? It's what college kids do, if you haven't noticed. Big architecture major man…" she trailed off and took another swig "And why would you care? You're in love with stupid Taylor"

"I care because I care about you"

"Yeah, yeah. I know" she rolled her eyes "Just leave me"

"Fine. Drink away your troubles"

"I will"

"Exactly like my mom"

"Don't judge me" Marissa snapped and threw her bottle at Ryan

"What the hell is up with you throwing things at me? And I can judge you because you're being stupid" he sat next to her "What happened to the happy girl that was studying fashion?"

"That girl was a fake smile" Marissa scoffed

"Why?"

"You're very observant aren't you? I already told you"

"That you love me?"

"Yes"

"Can't you just move on?"

"It's easier said than done—I should be strong but it feels so wrong"

"I don't love you"

"Whatever—I don't care anymore, do whatever you want to do. And I'll do whatever I want" she rubbed her face tiredly and walked upstairs

"Where are you going?"

"To get something for my pain" she motioned to her body

-

**GASP! What will happen? Can you guess? I know this isn't a love story, but I think you'll like the ending. I loved it when I wrote the last chapter… there's probably only about 2 or 3 more chapters until I'm done with this story! But all those people that are about to give up on this fanfic, please hang on. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Rating:** 'K'

**Author's Note:** I know I said there was going to be another 2 or 3 chapters, SCRATCH THAT. I now have decided to extend it much longer! I've also decided to take the readers into the lives of Ryan, Marissa and Taylor. This chapter will pick up when Taylor and Michelle are in the airport going back to Connecticut! Please read and review! I love all feedback!

-

**Chapter 4**

-

Taylor watched as her bumbling friend came running into the airport and wrapped her arms around Taylor's shoulders, obviously glad that they were going back to college. She couldn't say she was not excited, because she was ecstatic to return to her normal life.

"You're excited" Taylor laughed at her friend's behavior

"The past 2 weeks have been horrible—my mom was trying to set me up with this pig of a man, and I had to spend my days and nights trying to avoid him" Michelle rolled her eyes "I'm so glad we're going back"

"Same, I thought coming back to California would sort out all the problems I had. But things have just gone worse"

"Worse how?"

"I found out that my ex's ex was still in love with him and he told me he still had feelings"

"So you're leaving it unsolved?"

"Why wouldn't I? We still have the rest of the summer to spend with Tyler and stuff. It's not like I'm going to come back for another year or so"

"The longer you resist, it persists" Michelle smiled at her saying

Taylor laughed at her comment and turned around to see Ryan and Marissa entering the doors "Oh my god" she whispered apprehensively to Michelle and tried to hide herself but failed.

"What is it? Taylor! Why are you hiding?" Michelle spoke loudly, catching the attention of Ryan and Marissa

"Taylor?" Ryan walked up to Michelle and rolled his eyes "I know you're hiding"

She emerged from her friend's back and frowned "Hey guys…"

Marissa giggled "What were you doing Taylor? Hiding?"

"You guys heading home?" She tried to change the subject

"Actually, we just bid farewell to Seth and Summer—they just left"

"Aw! I didn't get to say bye" Taylor frowned

"They'll be coming back soon though, they just wanted to go back to help Che with a movement" Marissa rolled her eyes

Ryan looked at Taylor "How was Newport?"

"It was fun, me and mom really caught up. I saw my dad too, and his family—apparently, I now have a teenage brother and sister"

Ryan and Marissa looked shocked

"You can pick up your jaws off the ground now, I really like them. They seem cool"

"So you're going back?" Ryan asked

"Yeah—we're spending the rest of the summer with some of our college friends" Michelle answered

"So we better get going, bye guys" Taylor hugged Marissa quickly and embraced Ryan for a while until she let go "Bye" she and Michelle then walked off.

Ryan watched as Taylor walked out of his life for another year.

"Are you okay Ryan?"

"She walked back into my life only to walk back out" he frowned and made his way out.

-

Ryan was driving mindlessly back to the Berkeley house while Marissa was trying to get his attention.

"Ryan?" She tried, and when he didn't respond, she tried again

"Ryan!" No answer

"You can't help yourself can you?" Marissa snapped at him

"What?!"

"Dreaming about her, fantasizing about her, your whole world revolves around her"

"You can't force somebody to forget the person they care about. You're always like this, the world has to stop everything so we can focus on you—Marissa Cooper, the poor girl that nobody loves. Right?"

"I guess it wasn't strong enough, I guess I could've been a better person"

"I guess you could have"

"I'll leave you alone then, since everybody hates me so much" Marissa got out of the parked car and ran into the house.

-

"Taylor!" Tyler ran up and hugged her tightly "I've missed you!"

"Me too" she sniggered and kissed his cheek "The past 2 weeks was a good break"

He smiled his million dollar smile "I'm really glad you're back"

"I missed everybody so much—I can't wait until this summer really starts"

"It's going to be all time" He put his arm around Taylor and led her to the others.

Taylor had liked Tyler for so long, ever since they bumped into each other and she looked into those steely blue eyes. So much had happened since then, but her affections toward him were still true and unconditional, she had even thought one time that she was falling in love with him—and that scared her, she hadn't 'loved' anybody since Ryan and she was afraid of getting hurt again.

At first, she had denied the fact that she and Tyler had chemistry—because she still did love Ryan, but each time she wanted to love Ryan… each time she tried to, something kept her back, and she hated that there was a but. It didn't fit into her plan for how she wanted her college experience. 

But there was a 'but'. Tyler was a mystery, and she loved it! He was a different kind of guy to Ryan and she liked change. He was sweet, neurotic and adorable—she loved it. He made her laugh until it hurt, and made her cry until her tear ducts gave out. He was perfect and she hated it, because she knew Ryan wasn't the one anymore. It wasn't anything that he was doing wrong; it was just something he wasn't capable of. She just had to decide if it was something she could live without.

A girl knows when something is real, and she knew.

-

Ryan walked into the house from hours of mindless driving and walked upstairs, needing sleep badly.

Kaitlin walked past him "Where's Marissa? She's been gone for ages"

"Isn't she in the bathroom?"

"Whatever, I'll talk to her when she's out" Kaitlin made her way downstairs and out the door

-

Tyler and Taylor had spent the night together, watching movies and eating popcorn with the rest of the group. It started off as 15 kids, but it had dwindled down to only both of them, alone in front of her housing building, sitting on a bench, talking and laughing.

She couldn't just avoid him. She just had to make it clear to him how she felt.

"I know we've been dancing around the possibility of a relationship, and we've been through so much together already. It seems like it's the next step to plunge into the unknown. Give it a chance, Taylor" Tyler said, moving closer.

"I'm sorry I'm so complicated" she apologized, it was so hard to let go

"Why are you always apologizing?"

"Because I stuff up a lot"

"I know about Ryan and your history with relationships and I know you saw him when you went home, but I don't care about your past—you had a life before we met, the past is in the past and I'm happy to leave it there"

"Can I have some time to think before we do anything?" Taylor pulled away from the almost kiss and frowned

"Take your time, I'll be here waiting when you're done" He got up and smiled "See you tomorrow?"

"Yeah" Taylor waved goodbye and sighed _'Why does everything have to be so hard?'_

-

"Ryan!" Julie screamed from the bathroom "Come now, now!"

Ryan rushed out of his room and heard the screaming cries coming from the bathroom "Julie? What happened!?"

He stepped in and found Marissa lying in the bathtub, wrists cut, the water was blood red and she was a shade of white.

He couldn't believe it, he couldn't feel anything, and he blacked out.

-

**Ouch! Please read and review!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Rating:** 'K'

**Author's Note:** I know last chapter was short! But here's the next installment, with a good closure to the O.C.

-

**Chapter 5**

-

Upon the death of Marissa Cooper, Summer and Seth made their sad return to Berkeley, also upon hearing the tragic news, Taylor rushed back to Berkeley, bringing Tyler and Michelle for support, and to see if Ryan was okay.

The funeral had taken place in Newport, and Julie scattered her ashes on the lookout station where Marissa sat almost every night in high school.

-

_You say life is a dream where we can't say what we mean  
Maybe just some roadside scene that we're driving past  
There's no telling where we'll be in a day or in a week  
And there's no promises of peace or of happiness_

_Well is this why you cling to every little thing  
And polverize and derrange all your senses  
Maybe life is a song but you're scared to song along  
Until the very ending_

It had been almost 10 weeks since her funeral and Taylor and everybody else spent the summer helping the Coopers and Cohen's with their loss, Tyler and Michelle stood by Taylor as she helped Summer and Ryan through their grieving stage and was there with a shoulder to cry on when all the pressure was too much for Taylor. They felt like the weight of the world was on her shoulders, and they hated to see their friend in so much pain.

_Oh, it's time to let go of everything we used to know  
Ideas that strengthen who we've been  
It's time to cut ties that won't ever free our minds  
From the chains and shackles that they're in_

_Oh, tell me what good is saying that you're free  
In a dark and storming sea  
You're chained to your history, you're surely sinking fast  
You say that you know that the good Lord's in control  
He's gonna bless and keep your tired and oh so restless soul  
But at the end of the day when every price has been paid  
You're gonna rise and sit beside him on some old seat of gold  
And won't you tell me why you live like you're afraid to die  
You'll die like you're afraid to go_

But through it all, Tyler and Taylor's relationship grew more and stronger, while Taylor and Ryan's companionship grew stronger than they ever expected, she was saving him again and her friendship was priceless. He could feel himself moving on from his loss, it had taken almost the whole summer, but he was slowly, but surely, moving on to something better. __

_Oh, it's time to let go of everything we used to know  
Ideas that strengthen who we've been  
It's time to cut ties that won't ever free our minds  
From chains and shackles that they're in  
From the chains and shackles that they're in_

_Well life is a dream 'cause we're all walking in our sleep  
You could see us stand in lines like we're dead upon our feet  
And we build our house of cards and then we wait for it to fall  
Always forget how strange it is just to be alive at all_

At the end of the summer, everybody left, Seth and Summer went back to Rhode Island. Ryan went back to Berkeley, and Taylor, Tyler and Michelle went back to Yale. Taylor promising herself that she would not be affected by this one summer.

-

She sat down by the beach and admired the waves. It had been almost 3 years ever since she's come back to California… but she never got the chance to come back to Newport. She was only here because it was Seth and Summer's baby shower, and they wanted to have it where they grew up. But she was happy with her life in San Francisco.

She heard somebody sit next to her, it was him, Ryan. She knew he had found a girl and he was happy, she had dated Tyler for almost 4 months after that, but they graduated college and they wanted different things. She came back a year after working New York and saw Ryan again, it just hurt to know he had a new girlfriend.

"Are you okay? Michelle told me you were here"

"I'm happy now"

"I know"

"I'm sorry Ryan" she apologized "I know I hurt you"

"I understand" he shoves his hands in his pockets and stands up "It's weird huh? So much can change in a little amount of time"

"But everything happens for a reason" she smiled as she breathed in the night air, the sun was setting and it was a beautiful sight.

"Did you hear? I met somebody" he smiled "She's a law major, bubbly, brunette and gorgeous"

"I'm happy for you" she frowned

"You are aren't you?" he laughed and sat down again, wrapping an arm around her "I'll always love you though"

"Same"

"I really missed you Taylor—it's been so long"

"Ryan, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure"

"Why do you think Marissa did what she did?"

"Everybody has a reason for ending their lives—her one was to gain inner peace, and I think she got that. She lived a dramatic life, and she ended it the way she lived it"

"Did you let one summer change everything?"

"I don't know—it already has. But it changed us in different ways"

"Was the change for the better?"

"I don't know" he got up and brushed the sand off his pants "Want to get some coffee?"

"Sure, don't wait up. I'm going to spend a little longer here"

"Don't take too long"

-

In a way, each of them taught her a lesson, each of them would hold a special place deep in the crevices of her heart, and she was okay with that. They had shaped her into the person she is today… and she was thankful for that. And as she watched the sunset, Ryan was standing next to her as he waited for her to say goodbye to the past, she let all the pain flow back to the soundtrack of the waves.

She really did love Tyler and although she couldn't help but wonder why they were only able to express this love for not even six months, she was thankful that they shared a romance, getting her ready for her life after school.

She knew Ryan and she held nothing but a true, passionate love... a rare sort of love that one would read about in fairy tales, yet few spend their lives experiencing. She was grateful Ryan held her hand through her path of fears and love. Yes, she knew that one day, the heavy weight settling upon her heart would lift and she would be able to love Ryan and others freely... Yes, she knew she would receive more heartbreak as her life grew forward... and yes, she was afraid.

But was that heartbreak she now knew how to handle, and although it would hurt, she'd be able to get by... thanks to the help of a summer love. But she was thankful... ever so thankful. Watching the burning sun and rolling waves of North California roll in; she smiled, drifting away to his embrace.

-

**END**


End file.
